Lasers (Part 1)

Earlier this week, I took out my contacts to go to bed. Contacts that I have been wearing since I entered high school. Contacts that were preceded by years of horrible, horrible glasses. Contacts that are a seemingly permanent extension of my eyeballs. Contacts that correct my 20/400 vision. Contacts that I hope to never wear again.

I started looking in corrective eye surgery at the end of 2011, anticipating that I would use my 2012 flexible spending account to cover it. Appointments were set at several different offices. One location in particular scared the begeezus out of me. The place was chaotic, cluttered, dirty, and not exactly professional. The appointment was ridiculously short, but I was not upset since I could not leave that location fast enough. Since it was the first place I had checked out, I almost called the search off. At the suggestion of a friend, I went to 20/20 Institute. All the things that were wrong with the other place were right with 20/20. The professionalism of the staff and doctors, the thorough explanation of the medical procedure, and the willingness to take time to answer any questions and explain all the details. I left 20/20 with much better outlook on the future of my eyes. Naturally, I dropped the ball on the FSA that year, so the wait continued.

Throughout 2012, the procedure stayed in the back of my mind, popping up from time to time. When Sarah and my benefits enrollment rolled out in the fall, we were forced to make a decision. We slid some money into our FSAs and waited for the funds to become available to me after the first of the year. There was no turning back now, unless I became willing to eat that money. (Here's a hint, I am cheap, so I would not be.) With Carson's arrival and Sarah being off work for 12 weeks, now was the time to set up the procedure. A quick phone call to the office and I was set - my eyeballs were going to get lasered on March 1st.

Now I am sitting in a sort of laser purgatory - halfway between the world of blindness and the glory of perfect eyesight. The only thing that keeps running through my mind is the story told by my friend Johnny X after his eye surgery. During the procedure, his one job was to look directly at a red dot. Naturally, his mind started telling his eye to stay still, the eyeball hates authority and starts moving to spite the mind, and the mind retaliates with anger. Realizing that if the procedure failed it would be his fault made it harder to keep his eyes immobile. This cycle happened for the entire procedure, seemingly worsening the situation as it progressed. Despite all the mind games and his best efforts at causing catastrophic issues with his eyes, everything worked great and his vision was correct. Knowing that one day I might have eye surgery myself, this story has emerged from the caverns of my cranium numerous times over the past few years. I know for certain that his story will be played over and over as I lay on that table. Thanks for that, Johnny!

My lensless journey begins on Thursday with the standard eye exam to verify my information. Procedure on Friday, follow-ups on Saturday and the following Friday. How incredibly frightening and exciting at the same time.

Until the next post,
Mikey

Papal Pontification

By now, the news has spread around the world that Pope Benedict XVI has resigned his position as leader of the Catholic Church. With the new Pope being elected some time in March, this gives the world ample time to discuss who should be appointed as the next Pope. And no, this post is not going to be my ruminations on the Cardinal that I believe should or will ascend from the enclave. Off the top of my head, I can only name a couple. In looking through the list of all the active Cardinals, I only recognized the names of a couple more. Cardinal trivia ain't my thing. To be completely honest, I do not even know much about Benedict XVI, much less the crew of gentlemen who may follow him in history. (I would classify my lack of papal knowledge as average to above average Catholic.) Regardless of who the next Pope might be, I have a ground-breaking idea for him. Maybe it is my work rubbing off on me, but the next Pope should focus on getting some of that low-hanging fruit immediately following the emergence of that white smoke from the roof of the Vatican.

The range of topics that could and can be discussed in terms of the Catholic Church is long and controversial, but I do not wish to dwell on those. Perhaps another post. Instead, ask yourself this: How is it that we are living in the year 2013 and there are not female Catholic priests/bishops/cardinals/pope? Who can honestly tell me a legitimate reason as to why a female is not fit to wear the cloak of Christ? Exactly. Not a single defensible position can be made to refute my stance. History is not a valid argument. Neither is "well, they can be nuns." The Catholic Church is so antiquated on issues involving women. This new era in the Vatican would be a terrific time to move toward bridging that gender gap. Since its inception, the Church has been controlled by a bunch of white-haired men. That. Is. Wrong. My mother is in her 40s (you are welcome, Mom) and she was unable to be a Eucharistic minister for a large portion of her life. Females were not allowed to be alter servers when I first started as one back in elementary school. How has time passed the Church so rapidly? Or maybe the question is how has the Church refused to move with the world? Regardless of how we got to now, it is time to move forward to the present. It starts with righting a wrong that has been lingering for centuries.

I understand that there might be bigger and more important decisions to be made in the initial year as Pope. However if my name got called, I would be looking to create a renewed interest in the Church that I now shepherd. That interest could be generated with a single step towards the modern world we live in, rather than dwelling in the archaic nature of history. That interest can be sparked with one simple decree: "Women, we are equals. Feel free to immediately enter the seminary to become a priest. And I am sorry that it took us so long to say that."

Hall of Lame

With the announcement of the 2013 Baseball Hall of Fame vote being announced today, I planned on crafting a lengthy dissertation on how annoying the Baseball Writers Association of America members are. But then I ready two posts, one from my friend Jon (http://www.eksaxis.com/cheaters) and the other from Steven Goldman from SB Nation (http://mlb.sbnation.com/2013/1/9/3854546/baseball-hall-of-fame-theyre-all-scum). I think they echo my sentiments pretty well. 

Ah, hell. Here's what I'm thinking anyways. . .

The National Baseball Hall of Fame is responsible for recording the history of the game, good and bad. It is to recognize the greatest of the greats (Charlie Hustle, for Christ sake!). The BBWAA is full of pompous, self-righteous jerks who feel it is their responsibility to keep the game pure and clean. Except baseball is not pure and clean, nor has it ever been. Baseball has an unprecedented inequality in the financials between the haves and have-nots. Baseball has drug testing that is years behind the drug users. Baseball has blown calls, dirty slides, high and tight fastballs, stolen signs. Baseball's imperfections add to why it is the greatest sport out there. Despite the fact that these imperfections have existed, currently exist, and will exist in the future, the BBWAA attempts to smooth out the wrinkles. Baseball has wrinkles. If you cannot see that, you do not watch baseball. And if you do not watch baseball, you should not be voting for its Hall of Fame. 

I despise Barry Bonds. I booed him every time he appeared at Coors Field. I hated how he crowded the plate so aggressively that any pitch over the dish was an inside pitch that he was able to pull to right field. I hated his 30 pounds of body armor that he wore in order to set his toes on the black of the plate. I hated his jerky and unnecessary bat twitch as he awaited each pitch. I hated his cocky, smug, and reprehensible attitude toward everyone and everything outside of himself. Barry was good for Barry and the Giants, no one else. He was also the greatest hitter of his time. Period. Before you shed tears for those poor pitchers who were sacrificed every night on the mound, please remember that Barry Bonds was not the only baseball player who may or may not have been using steroids. And juicers were not just the big headed sluggers. Pitchers juiced too, right Roger? Who was juicing? Who was not? We will never know the facts about any of this. We cannot just ignore years and years of baseball history just because a cloud hangs over that particular time frame. Because of that, the Hall needs to operate per normal: the best players get in. Barry Bonds was the best hitter of his time. If he is not deserving of the Hall, who from his years of playing is? 

Until the next post,

Mikey

Resolutions Schmezolutions

The year of our Lord two thousand thirteen. Hard to believe it is already here. I am not typically a resolution person, mostly because I understood that they were a waste of my time. It is not that I don't believe in bettering myself, but I never actually do what I say I am going to do. That attitude probably puts me with approximately 98% of the population who do make New Years resolutions. It is amazing how difficult it is to make even simple changes in your life. I feel like this year is different, though. What better way to provide motivation than laying it out online for all to see?

To be quite honest, I am spoiled with where I am in life. My wife brings happiness to my life on an hourly (if not more frequent) basis. I have a beautiful, smart, and mouthy little daughter who loves me more than I deserve. Little man Flick is expected at any moment, helping me balance out the estrogen to testosterone ratio in our house. My job has taken me places that I did not expect to see this early in my career. The opportunities that are exposed to me daily are not typical of a person of my experience. Besides my bum knee, I'm holding up pretty well for a over the hill geezer who just hit 30. I am financially comfortable, own some things, and am looking to own some other things. Life is good, people. Life is good.

Regardless of how good life might be, there are things that happen that cause you to step back and take a broader view of who and what and where you are. Hitting 30 years old and realizing that I am about to have two little rug rats rolling around my house was my moment of reflection. Life is good - a couple little things can make it even better.

Number one on my list mirrors pretty much every resolution ever made. I need to get back into better shape. Kids are time consuming and exhausting. Add in wife, work, house, cars, everything else and your body takes a back seat. That cannot happen any more. The gym and I need to become acquaintances again. My natural reaction to free time is couch time. That needs to change to anything but couch time. The eating needs to slow down and get healthier. I have this fear that I get to a point where I cannot play with my kids because I am a fat blob and I can't handle physical activity. Although I am not at that point yet, I could always get to that point if I don't make a change soon. There is only one way to make sure this does not happen. Get after it.

Number two on my list is actually doing more with this blog. Writing is an outlet for me. Putting words on paper has always been a source of relaxation and stress relief. I blame it on my English-teaching mother and fantastic teachers along the way. Writing is therapeutic. My biggest issue with this blog has always been determining subject matter. Any recommendations would be greatly accepted (no seriously, suggestions would be great mikeflickblog@gmail.com). In 2012, I had exactly two posts on here (with an additional two on our family blog). Pathetic. In 2013, my goal is 12 (not including this one). I think an improvement of 6 times would be a great start. There is only one way to make sure those posts happen. Get after it.

Number three is photography. I grew up with cameras (my dad's Nikons from the 1970s) and now have a few of my own. They have been far too dormant the last few years, it is time for them to make frequent appearances. The first step is having a camera with me at all times. Step two is remembering that I have a camera on me at all times. Step three is taking lots and lots of pictures. Of family. Of friends. Of bridges (can't avoid the nerd in me, sorry). Of whatever I see. I hope that resolution three can arc back to resolution two - the pictures I take need to be displayed somewhere. All I ask is for constructive criticism of whatever I do share. Just like before, there is only one way to make sure that this happens. GET AFTER IT.

So here we go - publicly stating what I need to get after this year. If you see me slip up at all this year, remind me that I suck and I need to get after it. Saltier language will be accepted. And get after it, I must. My kids need a fit, refreshed, and camera-toting dad for years to come.

Until the next post (now with a sixth of the wait!),
Mikey

RIP 2012

Today is May 27th, so 2012 is not exactly nearing its climax. But for me, it is over.
15-31
17-28
For those of you who know me well, you know that I love baseball more than any other sport. The reason is simple - it is the greatest sport of all time. Those who know me also know that I have split loyalty between the team from my birth state and the team from my home state for the past 21 years. The numbers above are the current records of my Twins and Rockies, respectively. 
This season could not go much worse for the two organizations that I love. Let's start up north. 


Minnesota Twins
My expectations were extremely low heading into this season. To quote my preseason predictions: 

My Twins had the worst possible season last year with injuries at an all-time high and production at an all-time low. Their pitching staff scares me a bit, but I can't see them being worse than last year. Still no playoffs for the Twinkies this year.

I predicted the Twins to finish third in the AL Central. As an organization, they seem to find a way to fight through all the injuries, lost free agents, bad breaks, and still find a way to get close at the end of the season. This year, they will be lucky to finish with the third to worst record in MLB. Being in a different market and too cheap to buy MLB Extra Innings, I can't follow the Twins as closely as I would like. This leaves me slightly under-educated on the issues plaguing this edition of Twins baseball. The pitching has been weak, as everyone saw coming in. When 24 of your games have been started by Liriano (6.88 BB/9), Blackburn (8.37 ERA), Hendriks (15.0 H/9), and Marquis (DFA), you cannot possibly expect a winning record. I still was hoping that a healthy Mauer, a less concussed Morneau, and lots of speed in Span and Revere would keep them in contention for a while. Not so much. It doesn't matter how much your offense is clicking, when your pitching staff is giving up the most runs per game in the majors, wins won't happen. 

When it comes down to it, I lived through the Twins seasons between the World Series victory in 1991 (and the winning record the next season) and when they finally returned to relevance in 2001. I know and have experienced bad Twins baseball. This is just another one of those years. The same 'meh' feeling does not apply to me this year with the purple pinstripes.

Colorado Rockies

At the beginning of the season, I had the Rockies finishing in third place in the NL West. This prediction was based on the confusion stemming from the plethora of roster changes, the youth of the pitching staff, and the relative parity of the division. During the end of 2011 and this past offseason, O'Dowd was busy putting his newest mark on the franchise. (I say newest because he's changed his mind over and over during his tenure. Remember Hampton and Neagle and the big money free agent pitchers? How about Todd and the Toddlers and GenR?) The general theme was swapping out what the front office considered to be young busts with veteran players who 'knew how to win'. Gone were Seth Smith, Chris Iannetta, Ian Stewart, Jason Hammel, Greg Reynolds, and Casey Weathers. In were Jamie Moyer, Jeremy Guthrie, Marco Scutero, Casey Blake, Ramon Hernandez, and Michael Cuddyer. I saw this change as a way for the Rockies to contend until the young talent the Rockies had acquired could move up through the minor league system. 

The plan sounded great, but the execution has been horrendous thus far. 

Blake was released in spring training. Cuddyer started hot and has fizzled of late. Hernandez and Scutero have not lived up to their expectations at the plate. Guthrie has not been the workhorse that he was in Baltimore (when he not falling off his bicycle or playing catch with a cancer survivor). And Moyer has pitched like a 29 year old pitcher some days and a 49 year old others. The 2012 season, in essence, was preparing the organization for 2013 while playing well enough to keep fan interest and stay in the close NL West playoff race. The imported veterans, a healthy Helton, two legitimate superstars in Tulowitzki and Gonzalez, and a spattering of quality young players should be enough to win ball games. Instead, we are seeing 3 inning starts, a tired bullpen, an inconsistent offense, the worst Rockies defense in years, ineffective coaches, and, as a result, a losing record. Since I take my baseball fanaticism quite seriously, the results been infuriating. 

As a Rockies fan, I should be excited, right? Dick Monfort has publicly stated that patience is required for this version of his team. He has his front office and coaching staff in place that he thinks can lead the Rockies to successful seasons in the future. His front office has a vision and that vision will come to fruition as their young studs start showing up in Denver from Grand Junction, Modesto, Tulsa, and Colorado Springs. O'Dowd and his staff major league wins coming from the talented group that includes Pomeranz, Arenado, Rutledge, Nicasio, White, Bettis, Freidrich, Wheeler, Rosario, Anderson, Matzek, Story, Cabrera, and others. But you know what? Every other MLB team has a list of studs racking up numbers in the minor leagues. Every other MLB team has a list of players that have failed along their path to the majors as well. Judgement of a general manager and his people is based on how their percentage of success stories compare to the other organizations. And those success stories are created by high quality players leading teams to victories. Right now, O'Dowd does not have a passing grade. But according to Monfort, it is only a matter of time before we see that O'Dowd's report card is really showing an A+. 

The past 13 years of Dan O'Dowd have given us enough information to know about what we should expect from this cache of future All-Stars. Two playoff appearances (including a miraculous World Series trip during that awesome 20 wins in 21 games in 2007) in 13 years under O'Dowd. Numerous high draft picks busting out of baseball while players drafted right after the busts go on to great success (see 2006 draft boards). Hanging onto players well after their trade value is diminished (Hawpe, Atkins). Zero division titles. Zero World Series victories. All this leads me to zero confidence that this group of players coming up will be any different than the past groups.

As a fan, what have I gotten myself into?

Unrelated: as I wrote this post, I watched the movie Drive with Ryan Gosling. Holy crap, that is an awesome movie. Check it out if you have not seen it already. 

Until the next post,

Mikey

Happy Baseball

Unfortunately, work has been getting in the way of all my fun time. This clearly includes blogging. Since baseball is slowly progressing through its 13 opening days, I figured it was time for my annual sucktacular MLB picks. Last year, I believe my hit rate was around Tim Tebow's completion percentage. (It actually was probably worse.) No more chitty-chat. PLAY BALL!!

AL East - I think this year will see a shift in the power to the south. I know the Red Sox and Yankees will probably run away with this division since I am picking the Rays, but I like their pitching staff and their plethora of bats. The Trop still sucks.
1. Tampa Bay Rays
2. New York Yankees
3. Boston Red Sox
4. Toronto Blue Jays
5. Baltimore Orioles

AL Central - My Twins had the worst possible season last year with injuries at an all-time high and production at an all-time low. Their pitching staff scares me a bit, but I can't see them being worse than last year. Still no playoffs for the Twinkies this year.
1. Detroit Tigers
2. Kansas City Royals
3. Minnesota Twins
4. Cleveland Indians
5. Chicago White Sox

AL West - Pujols is Pujols. Darvish looks legit (and huge). McCarthy . Montero. This should be a fun division.
1. Texas Rangers
2. Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
3. Oakland Athletics
4. Seattle Mariners

NL East - I will enjoy watching the Mets suck all year. It will be fantastic. I will also enjoy watching Heyward and Giancarlo hit bombs.
1. Philadelphia Phillies
2. Atlanta Braves
3. Miami Marlins
4. Washington Nationals
5. New York Metropolitans

NL Central - Andrew McCutchen is one of my favorite players in baseball. He murders the Rockies every time they play. I see him exploding this year. He is going to be in the MVP race as the Pirates get off their losing season skid. Mark it down.
1. St. Louis Cardinals
2. Cincinnati Reds
3. Pittsburgh Pirates
4. Milwaukee Brewers
5. Chicago Cubs
6. Houston Astros

NL West - Possibly the most competitive division in baseball this year. I would think that 4 out of the 5 teams have a legitimate shot at winning the division. I love it.
1. Arizona Diamondbacks
2. San Francisco Giants
3. Colorado Rockies
4. Los Angeles Dodgers
5. San Diego Padres

AL Playoff Teams
Detroit Tigers
Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (Wild Card)
New York Yankees (Wild Card)
Tampa Bay Rays
Texas Rangers

NL Playoff Teams
Arizona Diamondbacks
Atlanta Braves (Wild Card)
Philadelphia Phillies
Saint Louis Cardinals
San Francisco Giants (Wild Card)

World Series
Tampa Bay Rays over Arizona Diamondbacks

Hello Again

Hi. My name is Mike, in case you forgot. I know I did.

• I saw Jonny X at Keith and Corrie's wedding. He didn't mention that my blog sucks. I am assuming that he had forgotten about it since the level of sucktitude has reached the Pittsburgh Pirates zone.

• The NFL lockout is over. Thankfully, we will have football this year because the Rockies and Twins suck. Oh wait, the Broncos and Vikings will too? Fantastic. 

• The political crap is starting up again. Gag. I have an idea that no one has considered when running for office - what if we did what's best for the country and not what's best to retain your voters? 

• That probably won't happen.

• Michelle Bachmann is crazy if she thinks that gas prices are dependent solely on the President of the United States. 

• The Republicans did a terrific job of handing the White House to the Democrats last election. There was no way they could have botched it up worse. However, they are trying to do just that this election. 

• Caveat - I am a centrist, a capitalist, and a center-leaning libertarian. I care about the future, the success, and the state of this country. Neither of the majority parties believe in this, which is why both majority parties disgust me. 

• Perfection is seeing my two girls curled up on the bed, sleeping the morning away. 

• Has the creation of Peanut Butter M&M's hurt the sales of Peanut M&M's?

• We are looking into selling our house next year. When we were looking for our starter home, we knew of its short-term life, so we were not as picky as we could have been. Now that we are looking for a 'forever' (or damn near) home, locking down location and amenities is WAY more stressful. 

• I am being cautiously optimistic about the firing of Bob Bradley and the hiring of Jurgen Klinsmann. I don't know enough about soccer to talk technically, but everything I read seemed to say that Bob Bradley's counterattack style was like the Billy Beane approach to baseball - good enough to be good, but not good enough to be great. I have heard that Klinsmann might be a lot of talk. I guess we shall see. 

• A while back, I took some time at lunch and wandered around downtown with my N80. I happened to wander over to Union Station and snapped some shots of the tunnel that had all the old rail connections. I found out a couple months later that the Union Station redesign had actually wiped that entire area out. All that history - gone. I'm so thankful that I got over there before it disappeared forever. 

• I developed a roll of B&W film that I have been sitting on for a while now. While there were some ok shots in there, I definitely could see that I have a long way to go to become a skilled photographer. If I didn't have any potential for improvements, what would be the point of doing it?

• We braved the crowds and the Swedish meatballs and went to IKEA the other day with John, Vicki, and Riley. It was amazing how much stuff was in that building and how cheap everything was. I don't think I would ever buy furniture from them (maybe for my kid's dorm), but their accessories and stuff were incredible. It was my first adventure in an IKEA and with my wife and a potential new house next year, it won't be my last.

• I should be working right now, but motivation is tough to find on a Saturday morning when your wife and daughter are sleeping, you have a laptop and a cup of coffee, and it is dark and quiet in the house.

•  I am running the Warrior Dash up in Copper Mountain tomorrow. Deuce, Keith, Ninja, Jonny X, and Kristin are all running it as well. It should be a fun time. 

• Every time I check the website, the number and type of obstacles change. Is this normal? 

• I am not physically ready to run a 5k with a bunch of obstacles. I'm planning on adrenaline to power me through. And I don't plan on setting any land speed records. 

• I have decided that I hate running. This might be an issue since I semi-trained for a running race. 

• The Town is a really enjoyable movie. 

Life for the Flicks have been crazy, as one could expect with hectic work schedules and a 14 month old. Mackenzie is still in her brace at night and during naps, but her hips seem to be improving greatly. We go back to see the doctor in October. She is so close to walking on her own. She will go all over the place if you hold her hands or if she can support herself on a table or chair. I keep trying to let go, but she immediately plops down on her diaper butt. Sometime soon she will be all over the place on her own two feet instead of her current situation of being all over the place on all fours. 

My work is keeping me extremely busy. The time spent in the office just flies by because so much stuff is going on and so much is required of everyone. The team is fantastic, though, and I have been enjoying it immensely. It still is below retirement in my 2012 depth chart. Come on, Powerball!! 

This year, my softball team decided we needed a change of pace. We have been playing on Mondays and against the same group of teams for years and years now. So we moved from D-Rec Mondays to D-Rec Tuesdays. Nobody expected the level of talent to drop that much, but it did. We finished the summer league tournament while having a 19-0 record overall (spring and summer). We have 10-run-ruled probably 80% of our games. Needless to say, we are moving up a division for fall. At least we got two shirts this year before we start getting throttled by some good comp teams. 

Only a few more months until I get Mackenzie up on the slopes. Right, Sarah?

Until the next post in 2014,

Mike

If There is a Chair 1 In Heaven, It's Yours

We all have teachers, professors, and coaches whose impact on our lives has left an imprint on us more than the average educator. As a 7th and 8th grader at All Souls, I was privileged to encounter one such teacher. She taught English and speech, coached the speech team, and was named Ms. Miles. Ms. Miles died this past week.

In the hallway, Trudy Jo Miles was intimidating and imposing. In the classroom, that intensity was multiplied by three. You learned quickly that there was no messing around on her watch. You got there on time, you paid attention, and you did your homework. Nothing else was acceptable. After a few short months, the intimidation factor wore off and you saw her as what she truly was: a fantastic woman and teacher. She knew the material she was teaching and she knew exactly how to cram it into your wandering, preteen, ADHD brain. 

Her most effective teaching tools were the chairs. A portion of your grade was determined by where you sat in the room. The classroom seats were numbered from 1 to 30. The smaller your daily average of seat position for the term, the better your seat grade. Seat upgrades were earned by correctly answering questions. For example, let's say there was a homework assignment from those friendly orange vocabulary books. The person in Chair One would say the answer to question one. The person in Chair Two would verify that Chair One's answer was correct. If Chair One's answer was correct and Chair Two confirmed it, Chair One would stay and Chair Two would answer question number two. If Chair One was incorrect and Chair Two caught the mistake, Chair Two would take Chair One's space. If Chair One was incorrect and Chair Two did not catch the mistake, the question continued to move back seat by seat until the right answer was given. The correct respondent got to claim their new position while every moved back one space. This continued until all the homework questions were answered. If you forgot your homework, you were automatically shuffled to the back of the room.

Every once in a while, Ms. Miles would call for a Jumble Up. This was her Chair version of high stakes poker. On those days, if you got a question wrong you did not just move one chair backwards; you moved to the back of the room. It was stressful and fun and always entertaining to see people move all over the room.

As a person, she was caring and thoughtful. She attended numerous sporting events being played by her students. She always had time for questions and extra assistance when needed. The few instances I returned to All Souls after graduation, she was on the list of people I made sure I stopped in to see.

Under her instruction and guidance, I established what I would consider to be a solid understanding of the English language. Because of her, I can still diagram sentences. Because of her, there is an MLA Handbook in my house. Because of her, I use correct grammar even when limited by 140 characters on Twitter. Because of her, I still cringe when I read emails and proposals written by engineers. Because of her, I still get into arguments about the necessity of the Oxford comma. (Seriously people, you need the comma! There is a huge difference between "I went for a walk with my dogs, Sarah and Mackenzie." and "I went for a walk with my dogs, Sarah, and Mackenzie.") Because of her, I love Faulkner, Hemingway, and To Kill a Mockingbird. Because of her, I feel comfortable speaking in front of people, even without a prepared speech.

Ms. Miles has influenced more than just this wayward student. I'm confident than hundreds upon hundreds of All Souls students share my sentiments. Thank you, Ms. Miles, for all that you did for me and the countless others you touched in your life. You will be missed.

All Souls will never be the same again.

Mike's Annual

BASEBALL! BASEBALL! BASEBALL!! BASEBALL!!! BASEBBBBBAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!!! if you have not gathered, baseball starts tomorrow. Someone is mostly excited. Completely. I am freaking pumped. I don't have time to do a full blown analysis of each division, so you only get the brief version this year. Not like my analysis mattered at all. Every year, my picks are so fubared by the second week of the season. Moral of the story, if you are planning on putting money on baseball this year, just look at my choices and pick another team. Let's get on to the picks. . .

AL East
1. Red Sox
2. Yankees
3. Rays
4. Orioles
5. Blue Jays

AL Central
1. White Sox
2. Twins
3. Tigers
4. Royals
5. Indians

AL West
1. A's
2. Rangers
3. Angels
4. Mariners

NL East
1. Braves
2. Phillies
3. Marlins
4. Mets
5. Nationals

NL Central
1. Reds
2. Cardinals
3. Brewers
4. Cubs
5. Astros
6. Pirates

NL West
1. Rockies
2. Dodgers
3. Giants
4. Padres
5. Diamondbacks

ALDS
Red Sox over A's
White Sox over Yankees

ALCS
Red Sox over White Sox

NLDS
Rockies over Reds
Dodgers over Braves

NLCS
Dodgers over Rockies

World Series
Red Sox over Dodgers

We'll check back in November to see how ridiculously wrong I am!!

Let's go Rockies and Twins!!

Til the next post,
Mikey

I Don't Care If You Think Your Music Is Better

Several weeks ago, I was like most people in that I did not watch the Grammy's. Award shows bore me, especially their endless and pointless drivel being spewed after anyone wins an award. I did, however, enjoy checking out the performances the few days following the show. The one performance that stuck out (for a couple reasons) was the combination of Mumford and Sons, The Avett Brothers, and Bob Dylan. My first thought when Mumford and Sons started playing was "When did Alec Baldwin start a folk-rock band?" Once I was able to get past this resemblance, I was able to enjoy the rest of the performance. While Bob Dylan was horrendous and The Avett Brothers were very, very good, Mumford and Sons' rendition of The Cave was absolutely amazing. The energy, the sound, the look, the music, everything impressed me. After enjoying their song, it was only natural to wander over to YouTube to listen to more of their work.

It was there that the musical elitists showed their mangy, dirty, ugly faces yet again. . .

A majority of the comments on the Mumford and Sons videos stated that they knew about the band before the Grammy's. These sages' prior knowledge made them musically superior to us schmucks who happened to be introduced to them more recently.

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize that discovering bands had a time limit. I truly apologize. I will push their exceptional performance into the recesses of my mind and immediately stop learning anything more about these talented folks because you, far superior musical listeners, have already filled the Mumford and Sons fan quota.

Their perspective blew me away, despite having seen this vitriol being directed toward newly-added fan bases in the past. The comment sections for videos of any up-and-coming band are littered with similar sentiment; only fans since the beginning allowed. Logically this makes no sense. When I am a fan of a band, I would like as many people as possible to enjoy them as well. More exposure and more positive responses mean more music being created by that band. It is a simple concept. A exceptional band with little following is forgotten about quickly, has less accessibility to their music over time, and has much less staying power than a pretty good band with a rabid following. Think about this situation outside of music. The Boston Red Sox, prior to 2004, had not won the World Series since 1918. The Chicago Cubs have not won the World Series since 1908. Every year, their seasons ended with disappointment. Despite this ineptitude, the fanatical fan bases have keep these teams consistently two of the three most popular teams in baseball. (Who had the 5th in the "Which paragraph will Mike make an unnecessary reference to baseball?" pool?)

Back in the music world, think about what happened with Green Day in the 90's. They were considered sellouts when their albums starting going mainstream. Their popularity drove the punk world into a punkish frenzy. Years later, Green Day is one of the most successful bands of our time. They are 50 years old and still dropping punk records that sell like crazy. I would argue that their success was the impetus to the today's punk popularity. Prior to Green Day's supposed sellout, how many punk bands were in the regular rotation of mainstream radio stations? It wasn't many, if there were any at all. Perhaps the Mumford and Sons Grammy performance will do to folk rock what "Dookie" did for punk, pull their style of music from the fringes and to a wider audience. For that reason alone, those original and elitist Mumford and Sons fans should embrace these new additions to their club and look forward to years and years of banjo rocking.

In the grand scheme of things, why should anyone care how or when people unearth music they enjoy? I discovered Mumford and Sons from the 2011 Grammy's. My love of classic rock bands like Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd stems from my middle school friends. I was exposed to Rise Against through friends in college. I learned about Muse through Guitar Hero. I was turned on to Oasis because someone told me they were going to be the biggest thing out of the UK since the Beatles. I started liking Radiohead as I listened to and bantered about their music with my coworker Alex while we ran Atterberg limit tests. I listened to George Strait because my mom loved him when I was growing up. I found David Hasselhoff because I love freedom and light-up suits. And I was blessed with The Darkness because their awesomeness revealed itself to me in a beam of heavenly light. The various ways I found these bands doesn't make my love for each particular band more or less authentic. To all you musical elitist with your superiority complex - take a quick look at how ridiculous you sound and get the heck over yourself.

Until the next post,
Mikey